Archivist note: This post is from an older recovered archive.
==Initial Post==
((Posted by Mr Underby on July 6, 2010))
Mr Underby sat at a dirty table near the front window of the Bucket of Blood, playing Spiderette with a deck of tarot cards. He snapped down the Fortune card as Boris approached. He looked up.
"Mistah Unduhby, I gots Miss Dizelle mopping the floor… she’s better at that than mixin d’drinks."
Underby gazed toward the dark back of the bar and watched Dizelle jerk around with the mop in her hands. "Mm, that Tin Roof Rusted was hideous. I didn’t mind it."
"I dun think its drinkable, Mistah Unduhby."
"O, am I paying you to think now? Perhaps you wish to have a raise?"
Boris smiled suddenly, somewhere in the distance a mirror cracked. "A raise! That’d be great!"
Underby gathered up his cards and tossed them toward Boris’ face. "Yes, I’m certain that would be great, and you shall have a raise the moment Dizelle gives birth to piglets, now be away with you."
Boris turned, grinding his teeth, toward the front door where a shadow hovered.
Underby sighed and looked down at the cards strewn across the floor… he had been winning. "Pip!" he called out.
Pip came running around the bar. "aye!" he said, saluting.
Underby winced. "Bring me a new deck of cards, Pip, and a bottle of Rot Gut and a glass"
"aye!" he called and ran back to the bar.
Boris had let some manner of vagabond into the bar. "Mistah Unduhby, this guy says he’s d’mayor o’ d’city…"
"That is three feet too tall to be Tenk, are you as blind as you are incompetent?" Underby growled.
"Uh, maybe he said king…"
Underby looked at the vagabond. "You must be His Highness, the Emperor, am I correct?"
"If I must be, then -hic- I suppose I am" the vagabond answered slowly. Underby stared at him as he swayed on his feet.
"Have you any money? Royalty holds little sway in this establishment, good sir."
"I have ten five dollar coins, which were donated to me by-"
"Show him to a stool so he may pass out in peace, Boris." Underby interrupted. Boris steered the derelict toward the stool farthest away from where Underby currently sat; perhaps not as incompetent as he seemed.
Pip brought the bottle and glass to Underby’s table. "ere ye are, YoYo. gonner have a drink before the urchins arrive fer Lo’s party?"
"No," said Underby. "I am going to have several drinks."
"ow many?"
Underby looked down at his small assistant. "Legion."
Pip smiled, his eyes crinkling up in deep folds. "gonner get drunk, eh?"
"No." Underby answered again, as he poured himself a tall drink. "I believe the word used in situations such as this is ‘blotto’."
Underby knocked his drink back. "Now. Where are those cards?"
==Comments==
*Comment by Gilhooly Skute on July 6, 2010 at 7:22pm
cor, I know a little rummy…
…’is name’s Skyler.
sticks out tongue
*Comment by Skyler ‘Artful Dodger’ Gant on July 6, 2010 at 7:47pm
Head jerks up at the mention of Rum
Someone got Rum for me then?
Looks around for the Rum, sighs, lowers head, walks away
*Comment by Mr Underby on July 7, 2010 at 4:19pm
There will be no free rum in my establishment.
*Comment by Zaida Marie Thibideaux Gearbox on July 7, 2010 at 4:32pm
But dere gonna be free moonshine at Zaida’s!
*Comment by Phaedra Wickentower on July 7, 2010 at 5:22pm
Rough day, my darling?
*Comment by Sheryl Skytower on July 7, 2010 at 5:40pm
It’s way too hot in my home.
I first read this as "Fist of Many".
snorgles
;)
*Comment by Skyler ‘Artful Dodger’ Gant on July 7, 2010 at 5:54pm
((Ha. XD. An easy mistake there Sheryl. Just pour a glass of Iced Tea and cool off.))
Chugs bottle of Rum
Bought fair and square Mr. U.
