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Statement to the Militia (originally written in French)

My mother was right, I was fated to be thrown into cages. It is never my fault, never intentionally breaking the law, but I just stumble into incidents and get arrested, captured, and sometimes spend a few weeks in a zoo. That’s how I got stuck living in the circus for five years. But you do not want to hear about that in my official report I suppose, so I will tell you what happened. I just hope you can understand French.

I was cleaning at my bar, Alley Cats, when I saw that there was something going on over at the Rookswood Brewery. Meaning I saw the front door wide open and then suddenly shut. I know there was no one working late at night cause most of the workers had just left bar and watched them all heading home through the windows as I cleaned. I paused in my cleaning and headed over to the brewery to check out what was going on. As I enter I see a cougar and a wolf fighting and I roared. How dare they use my brewery for a brawl! I wasn’t sure whom either were but I had smelled the wolf before. He had stayed nearby where Cyan and Lilith had lived below the brewery and was sure he must be a friend of theirs.

If he was friends of theirs then he was a friend of mine. I rushed to them and was glad my roar had unsettled them. I tackled the cougar tossing him aside like he were a toy. I could see the wolf was pretty injured which made me even angrier. I headed over to the cougar to jump on him to incapacitate him when an explosion rocked the brewery. I hadn’t noticed until then the other occupants of the brewery setting the place aflame. That’s when I noticed the wolf head to the doors and I followed as I didn’t want to be buried underneath the brewery debris.

Once leaving the brewery I was instantly tranquilized, not that I haven’t felt that before, and fell to the ground for a nice sleep.

That is all I remember from the events.

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5 Comments

  1. Jedburgh30 Dagger Jedburgh30 Dagger August 12, 2015

    Un ours qui parle français. Comment choquant!

    • Baird DuBois Baird DuBois August 13, 2015

      Écrire en français, mais seulement peut parler Ours je le crains.

    • Baird DuBois Baird DuBois August 14, 2015

      Je pense que votre inflexion est mauvais, sauf si vous voulez me marier.

    • Caesar Osterham Caesar Osterham August 15, 2015

      There is only one possible reply to such a statement.  In the words of the bard:

       

      Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
      Roma-roma-mamaa!
      Ga-ga-ooh-la-la!
      Want your bad romance

       

      I think that that really says it all.

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