Standing at the counter in the New Babbage Free Press office, Junie stood and re-read for about the hundredth time the ad she was about to place. It seemed a necessity. Martin was off galavanting around Builder knows where in between his chauffeur duties, Bert had apparently taken a job sweeping chimneys, Momoe and Kaylee were busy elsewhere, Njal was undoubtedly tarting around town, and tending bar was never something Mr. Lighthouse had enjoyed. Now that she thought about it, as far as she could remember, she wasn’t sure he had ever done it at all. Now that she was engaged in useful work in the City Archives, it was time to find a new staff to see to the well-being of The Gangplank.
Trustworthy bartender. Must be able to pour drinks, mix drinks, serve patrons, and occasionally sneer to make them feel seen. Must also be willing to wipe counters, mop floors, and clean the unmentionable places in the bar. Long hours.
Baker and chef. Must be willing to wake before dawn to buy the freshest ingredients from the market, to prepare recipes to owner’s specification, keep the ovens fired, and maintain a tidy kitchen. Aspic or gefilte fish will result in immediate dismissal.
Ordained cleric, to bless a rebuilt bar. Must provide own wine.
Bouncer. Must be able to drive unsavory types from the bar and see to its general security. Must also safeguard confidential documents in the office and execute other top secret activities as assigned.
*** All staff must be willing to maintain the privacy of the owner. They must not reveal her location to any old women with white hair and smelling of mothballs. ***
Room and board, a small stipend, and tips. May choose from available apartments above the bar. No loud music. Pets must be approved.
Please inquire with Miss Juniper Ginsburg at The Gangplank, Clockhaven.