Bar Wars: Diggin’ Up Bones

Sky kept watch just inside the entrance to the catacombs, sticking to the shadows as her eyes scanned the night for any unwelcome visitors. “How much longer are you going to be!?” she hissed anxiously. Sky had had reservations about breaking into the catacombs in the first place, not because it was illegal, but the place just gave her the creeps.

“As long as I need to be, dammit!” Scottie growled. He surveyed the beds of bones before him, picking out what he considered choice skulls from the stone beds and tucking them into a bag. They couldn’t be so old that they were crumbling, he’d already learned that on one that had crumbled to dust in his hand deeper into the catacombs.

This idea may have been funny to talk about, but the execution was far more grim than he had expected. While he wasn’t as superstitious as his wife, the catacombs gave off a very eerie feeling that made him hurry as quickly as possible.

Finally, the second sack was full. He bound them tight and hurriedly made his way to the stairs. He stopped cold and pulled a gold coin with an emblem from the old Empire from his pocket, one Sky had instructed him to use. He placed it beside the first grave he had taken a skull from as payment for their withdrawal. Whether this was a pirate or Builder superstition, he didn’t know.

He bounded up the stairs quickly, reaching the top step and being confronted by the stern stare of his wife. He sighed and held out both bags to her, which caused her to shrink back. She made the sign of the Builder and mumbled something that sounded like a prayer. He rolled his eyes but held them out there until she was finished. Finally, he slung the bag over his back and they both peeked outside for anyone who may have been watching. Satisfied, they slipped out the door and back toward Port.

—

But they didn’t stop at Port. They pushed on past City Hall and finally into the Gut. Scottie and Sky both wore their swords and Sky had been twirling a knife around her fingers in a clear message to any of the usual gangs of thieves that these two were not easy prey. They didn’t want to have to deal with a group like the Pennyfarthing Boys tonight.

As they neared the Bucket, the two simultaneously recoiled at a smell that seemed to physically push them back. Sky pulled out a kerchief and Scottie brought the collar of his jacket across his nose. The two looked at each other, “What in the name of the Builder is that!?” Sky
whispered.

Scottie shook his head in wonder and then shrugged helplessly, “Gotta get this finished.” They hurried off to the door, Scottie standing aside and keeping watch while Sky expertly picked the lock. The door swung open and the couple ducked inside, closing it behind them.

They moved carefully around the edge of the bar, the light of the dying fire in the fireplace their only light. On the bar sat their prize: The skull of Underby’s mother.

Scottie drew his breath and looked to Sky, who nodded her head quickly. She backed away while Scottie set down both bags. Then he picked up the first and dumped it out as quietly as one can empty a bag of skulls on the floor. The resulting thudding made them both freeze and tense.The last thing they needed was to wake the residents or, more worryingly, Bib.

Scottie cursed and began to hurry. He lifted the glass cover and picked up what remained of Mrs. Underby. He examined the skull for any identifying marks and when he was satisfied there weren’t any, he tossed it onto the pile. Scooping up the next sack, he emptied out that bag on top of the pile, burying Mother Underby’s between. Sky pulled on Scottie’s jacket and pointed up. Scottie stopped and listened, hearing a creek in the upstairs floorboards. They each grabbed an empty sack and darted for the door.

The couple emerged and were immediately assaulted by the overwhelming smell of death. They rushed up the stairs and away from the Bucket, not stopping until they crossed the tracks into Babbage Square.

Sky panted, “Ooh, I still smell it! I’m going to have burn these clothes, you know.” Scottie grinned and bit his lip, “Well, don’t let me stop you…” Getting his breathing under control, he put his arm around her shoulder and started walking with her again, adding, “It was all worth it.”

Sky regarded him with a skeptical look, casting a glance back at the empty bags he had slung over his other shoulder, “I hope so.”