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Chief of Medicine – Applications

The Baldas Memorial Hospital is now accepting applications for the position of Chief of Medicine.  The Chief of Medicine will essentially run the hospital and answer only to the hospital administrator, Canergak.  They’ll be able to order supplies, balance budgets, and the administator will provide the funds you claim you need.  He apparently doesn’t mind if your reputation or ethical conduct has been less than perfect in the past.  

In other words, he doesn’t care if you’re known as a mad scientist.

All you need to do to apply, seriously or not, is to provide the following in a response here:

Your name, your doctorate/qualifications, and why you think you should be entrusted with the day to day runnings of the hospital including the oversight of all its medical supplies and budget.

*Steps back and goes to find some popcorn*

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  1. Tepic Harlequin Tepic Harlequin June 12, 2015

    Dear Sirs,

    In reference ter yer advert, please accept this application.

    Name: Tepic Harlequin (Vulpes Sapiens)

    I got bout half a dozen of them bits of paper that says yer a Doctor, some of em are for medicine, but none of em have me name on yet, till i get Sammy the Scribe on the job, shouldn’t take too look, he can do a job sharpish like.

    Reckon I could look after the hospital, i bin patchin up urchins fer some time, lookin after em durin the zombie plagues, includin the one where they turned inter lizards an eggs and i ain’t never cut no ones leg off or nuffin like that, not like some of them so called doctors…

    I runs me own business bringin stuff in fer people, makin sure it’s all accounted fer, an they pays up prompt, yer gotta be good at keepin track fer that, otherwise some fellas would try an play daft buggers. Yer can always get good value fer yer dosh by bringin stuff in quiet like too, so yer culd get some good savins, an fer only me usual fee….

    Would need a bit o’ time ter keep up with the vole milkin, doin me work in the factory, playin me flute fer the ghosts an errr….. other peoples as likes ter hear some music sometimes, oh, an ter keep track of stuff as is goin on, an organisin fer the winter, can never start too soon, an of course if anythin interestin is goin on would want a bit of time off ter go an see, but i am sure i could fit the job inbetween all that.

    If yer want ter see me qualithi.. qualit… bits of paper, i can gets em to yer as soon as the ink dries proper, an can pop by fer a chat anytime….

    Hang on… who’s in charge of this shindig? That bloke? Yer sure? Bloomin heck, if it’s him i ain’t got a chance, oh well, maybe next time?

    Yours faithfully

    Tepic Harlequin, B.U.M.(retired)

    • M. Canergak M. Canergak July 10, 2015

      Vulpines Sapiens,

      Your application has been considered but we are not interested in pursuing further action at this time for any position.  While others describe your work ethic as impeccable, our personal history would require some gurantees of future loyalty. If you remember our previously enlightening deal I would be willing to listen to such an offer and make a fair offer in return. 

      I would still be happy to collect any medical licenses that you currently have in your possession.  I believe some previous owners were searching for them.

      M Z. Canergak

  2. Zaros Xue Zaros Xue June 12, 2015

    Greetings! I am Zaros Xue, cabbit extrodinare!

    As you are most likely well aware I and my fellow cabbit Kea Chii were in fact the architects of the hospital it’s self so we know all the secret passages and hidden tunnels we put in there to smugle- YOU SHOULD HIRE US!

    Yes you should hire us to work in your fine establishment! Why? Well, we don’t have doctorates per say but we do have a wide range of medical and scientific knowledge far beyond what your average doctor would have which in my opinion is better than a doctorate anyday!

    You no doubt are aware of the martian invasion of a few years ago, well we specilize in aliens of all kinds, martians and beyond. Got a mutant? We can handle it! Got a ghost? We can… well, maybe make them better. Sometimes they end up getting fried though…

    Look, what I’m TRYING to say here is, we’re busy people who are running about the city doing odd jobs but if a moreau plods on in and turns out to be from Alpha Centauri or one of those ape- erm, humans with two hearts comes in then most doctors would be at a loss! And a loss means a possible lawsuit. We however are willing to tear away from our important city activities to treat and/or help treat patients who are somewhat on the exotic side… for a modest fee of course.

    So yeah, Zaros Xue and Kea Chii! Your on call doctors for the out-of-the-ordinary! And yes I know full well this isn’t the job posting you were asking for but do you have any idea how expensive it is building a network of undergrou- erm…. building a big house is?! It’s expensive!

    Also sorry if I rambled a bit, I’m using a machine that-  
    Hey Zaros where’s the…
    KEA! I’m recording, honestly!-
    Now where was I? Oh yeah, I’m using a voice to text machine, fantastic device but it’s a bit of a pain to edit. I should wrap this up. Hire us! Even if it’s just every so often.

    Head of the New Babbage Guild of Technology, Science and The Arts,

    – Zaros Xue.


    • Kristos Sonnerstein Kristos Sonnerstein June 13, 2015

      ((New Babbage TSA? Haha! XD))

    • M. Canergak M. Canergak July 10, 2015

      To Zaros Xue,

      It is good to discover that you have recovered and indeed gone on to head such a lofty institution.  I am also pleased with the construction that you completed very efficiently.  I shall give your names to the new Chief of Medicine as potential private practice doctors that he or she may call upon.

      M Z. Canergak

  3. violet Solano violet Solano June 12, 2015

    violet Solano walks into theBaldas Memorial Hospital hands the duty nurse a document and walks out snickering
       To the Directors of The Baldas Memorial Hospital
      Dear Sirs my name is Qismah often known as the Herbalist, I am submitting my application to you for the position of Chief of Medicine for your most worthy Hospital.

    My qualifications are as follows

     place of birth Cairo Egypt  b 1852


     six years of training in eastern medicine, herbalism, and Pharmacy, Cairo Egypt,

    a Doctorate in medicine and Pharmacy from wattlecross Medical College  York England

    Doctorate of medical surgery and two years internship at  Norah Brightnose memorial Medical College and Hospital Amaranth

    my knowledge of Eastern Medical practice allows me to seek alternatives when western science is at a loss for answers, and my in depth and personal understanding of  moreau physiology makes me admirably suited to treat the many and oft overlooked  moreau members of our community, My training as a Pharmacist and in Eastern Herbalism  will allow me to work with other Doctors in the creation of new drugs to better heal your patients

    to conclude i am in my humble opinion best suited to head your Most Worthy and Honored place of healing
                            Qismah called the Herbalist

    • M. Canergak M. Canergak July 11, 2015

      To Qismah the Herbalist,

      While we appreciate your interest in the position we have selected another applicant.  However we are always looking for more suppliers of proven and experimental medicines and there are no shortage of test subjects at the asylum.  

      In the hopes of an accord,

      M Z. Canergak

      • violet Solano violet Solano July 11, 2015

        Qismah opens up a letter sent to her by an M Canergak, and reads,..

        To Qismah the Herbalist,

        While we appreciate your interest in the position we have selected another applicant.  However ……….

        .”but i never submit……………….VIOLET!”

  4. Kristos Sonnerstein Kristos Sonnerstein June 13, 2015

    Dear Mr. Canergak,
    I am writing to apply for the position of Chief of Medicine at the hospital. I hope that my track record at the hospital as one of the primary physicians and surgeons speaks for itself,  but as a reminder, my field is in general medicine, surgery and genetic studies both theoretical and of practical application.
    As a standing employed doctor of the hospital, I am already familiar with it’s day to day runnings and needs and if placed in the position would know best what to look for in searching for a new secondary physician to fill my own empty spot. I trust that my good will and services thus far have well proven my suitability for the position.

    Dr. Kristos Sonnerstein 

  5. violet Solano violet Solano June 15, 2015

    found on Mr Canergak’s desk in the morning after the songbird indecent

     Dear Sir i believe you should hire me to the post of Chief of Medicine at Baldas Memorial Hospital,
    i am ever so cunning, and capable with a knife.
    sincerely………… Mr Eliot

    • M. Canergak M. Canergak July 10, 2015

      To Mr. Eliot,

      I am aware of current events and suggest that you turn yourself in to the local authorities while you have the cognitive ability.  Captain Heinrichs has been notified that the Murgam Asylum deals with patients with your particular disorders every day and we have room for you on the third floor.  If you turn yourself in now you may just end up on the second floor.  Believe me when I inform you that you do not want to end up on the third floor.

      M Z. Canergak 

  6. Myrtil Igaly Myrtil Igaly June 15, 2015

    Myrtil sneaks inside the Baldas Memorial Hospital and smiles at the nurse behind the counter, then hands her a rolled parchment.
    “‘ello Miss! There was that tall gentleman outside who asked me to give that to the Head of the Hospital. He was quite dashing I must say! And very well-dressed. He said that was for the open position of Chief of Medicine.”

    The parchment, to which a portrait photography was clipped, reads :

    “Doctor Frederick F. Fredericksen, doctorate in Experimental Psychiatry, Brain Surgery, Electro-acupuncture and General Medicine. Thirty years of experience in the Northern Circle.

    Tired of the cold climate of my home country, I decided to travel more south and heard about an open position in your Hospital.

    I hereby respectfully apply for this position as Chief of Medicine.

    In the hope of hearing from you,

    Doctor Fredericksen.”


    • M. Canergak M. Canergak July 11, 2015

      To Doctor Fredericksen,

      While you were not selected for this position, I would like to speak with you in person at your convenience so that we can go over some interesting things about your credentials.  

      M Z. Canergak

      • Myrtil Igaly Myrtil Igaly July 12, 2015

        To Mr Canergak,

        I am humbled by your invitation and will call to schedule soon.

        Dr F. F. Fredericksen


  7. Nyanka Jinx Nyanka Jinx June 16, 2015

    For some reason, Dr. Jekyll was unable to turn in his application
    himself. His “assistant,” Edward Hyde, had to drop it off at the hospital
    instead. Not that he was too happy about running errands on short
    notice, but he decided to preform the task in his own way; He broke into said hospital at 2 in the morning and left the following note on the front desk.

    To whom this may concern,

    I am applying for the position of Chief of Medicine at your hospital. I graduated from St Thomas’s Hospital Medical School in 1858 in the top 10 percent of my class. I specialize in Chemistry and Pharmacology.

    I’ve had many years of experience. Back in London, I had a reputation for helping the needy and making remarkable discoveries in my field. I am more than capable of handling the responsibilities of the job. I understand the risks concerning the inmates and intruders, but I assure you I am a responsible, reasonable man.

    Despite my limited experience in New Babbage, I feel I could be a boon to your establishment. Please contact me if you have any further questions.

    Yours respectably, Henry Jekyll, M.D., D.C.L., L.L.D., F.R.S., etc.

    • Emerson Lighthouse Emerson Lighthouse June 16, 2015

      Psst, Jekyll – if it doesn’t work out for you at the hospital I might be ablle to employ someone with your chemistry and pharmacology skills. The pay is the best in town, just ask Njal. No need to ask anyone else.

      • Nyanka Jinx Nyanka Jinx June 16, 2015

        Thank you for the kind offer, Emmerson, but I’m not too keen on being a bartender if that’s what you’re implying.

        -Dr. Henry Jekyll

        • Emerson Lighthouse Emerson Lighthouse June 16, 2015

          Right, we’re speaking code. ;-)

    • M. Canergak M. Canergak July 11, 2015

      To Dr. Jekyl M.D.

      We would like to formally offer to you the position of Chief of Medicine at the Baldas Memorial Hospital at your earliest convenience.  We should like to meet at the Hospital on Monday to go over all of your many responsibilities that you will be accepting.  I hear that you already have an assistant who you shall be able to bring on staff.  We look forward to meeting this Mr. Hyde and yourself Doctor.

      My Congratulations,
      M Z. Canergak

      • Nyanka Jinx Nyanka Jinx July 11, 2015

        Hyde was just coming back from another one of his “adventures” when he noticed the letter left for Jekyll under the front door. Hyde took it inside and opened it up, knowing full well he was reading a note not technically addressed to him.

        Not that it mattered, anyway. Both sides of him were overcome with joy when he saw the good news. Hyde quickly gathered ingredients from the cabinets and shelves of the private laboratory, so that Dr. Jekyll himself could be able to write a proper response to Mr. Canergak’s letter.

        Little did they know exactly what sort of mess they were about to get into.

  8. Kasa Kasa June 21, 2015

    Kasa groans once more as she was still recovering and trying to get, all the files sorted, so many new applicants and well as acting doctor she was quite busy. It was late in the evening when the other nurses finally approached her one speaking up “Kasa you seriously should try and go for the postion I meen, since Vipers passing you been here night and day.. and even before then, you learned under him and well all the other nurses and I agree we trust you.” Kasa thinks a bit, her ears twitching “Its true I did learn alot under him.. I have no degree but I can still learn more as I go… Ok ok I will go fill out an application for head of medicane.. who knows what will happen.” Kasa heads off to her makeshift office to start working on it.


    After a few hours Kasa emerges, setting her application on the stack with the others.

    I am applying for the postion of head of Medciane, I studied many years under Dr. Viper and helped him in both surgery as well as basic exams. I specliaze in toxins and anti toxins, I have been here at the hospital as a nurse since Canergak pushed for me to be educated. I have no offical degree but I the knowladge I was taught from Viper, and from what I learned being a field nurse here in New Babbage, as well as what I learned from books. I understand if it does not qualify me fully but I have been running the hospital day to day since his passing, and was doing alot of work to keep it running when I was a student under him. It is not hard to reach me as I am always at the hospital as a live in nurse.

                                                          Nurse Kasa Kranfel.

    • M. Canergak M. Canergak July 11, 2015

      Dear Kasa Kranfel,

      I was pleased to learn that you have fully applied yourself with the opportunity afforded to you.  For that I regret informing you that someone else has been selected for the position.  Fortunately there is another position which we had never considered and which it seems prudent we fill if the Cheif of Medicine is ever indisposed.  If you are interested we are now offering to you the position of Head of Nursing.

      May your Mind always remain sharp,
      M Z. Canergak 

  9. Beryl Strifeclaw Beryl Strifeclaw June 28, 2015

    I suppose someone should have mentioned the deadline was Sunday June 28th on the advertisement…

    *Ammended to July 6th due to several not having the time between today and tomorrow.*

  10. Erica Fairywren Erica Fairywren July 5, 2015

    Dear Sirs,

    Please accept this humble application for your consideration for the post of Chief of Medicine.

    My name is Erica Fairywren, and I’m in possession of doctorates in electrochemistry and physical engineering. Though at first it may seem that the two disciplines might be dissimilar to that of the medical sciences, recent advances in my own experiments have shown integral links between the two and coupled with my experience as a volunteer nurse in your institution, I believe I could not only fill the post, but expand the horizons of medical science as a whole.

    In my extensive experimentation with electricity, I have personally been the reipient of a number of powerful jolts and have not as yet expired, which leads me to conclude that electricity is misconcieved as mortal danger and may even have numerous health benefits including therapies for currently untreatable conditions. I am of the belief that the human body is but an elaborate electrochemical machine and I believe I could apply the same principles I have used on non-living devices to the living ones.

    It would be my aim, as Chief of Medicine, to apply my vast experience of electricity and electrochemistry to the furtherment of the medical profession. Naturally, a lot of experimentation would be required and doubtless … setbacks might be encountered but I trust this would be well within statistical limits and hopefully be considered nominal collateral losses.

    I do hope my lack of a medical doctorate does not dissuade you from consideration of my application, and would cite my keen ability to learn quickly and my bedside manner and sensitivity might make up for any perceived shortfall.

    Yours sincerely,

    Erica Fairywren

  11. Beryl Strifeclaw Beryl Strifeclaw July 8, 2015

    Applications closed and being considered and everyone can expect responses by at least Friday.  

    • Nyanka Jinx Nyanka Jinx July 8, 2015

      That’s wonderful news, Beryl. I look forward to the responses.

      – Dr. Henry Jekyll

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